


Monster Education

by Andydrarch



Category: Avenue Q - Lopez/Marx
Genre: Expect a lot of overanalysis of this universe lol, F/M, but in a vague way bc this is just supposed to be domestic fluff, lots of I guess pseudo biology bc monsters get me thinking, right off the bat Kate has claws and fangs and a tail just a heads up, vague sexual themes but that’s nothing new am I right lol
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-01-05 10:29:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18364202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andydrarch/pseuds/Andydrarch
Summary: Monsters aren’t really that different from your average human, except they kind of are. Princeton learns a lot about those differences from Kate.





	1. I guess it’s foreplay

**Author's Note:**

> This story’s first just to set the tone I guess but just as a heads up this isn’t going to be EXACTLY chronological all the time lol

So the date had gone really well. At least, Princeton assumed it had since he and Kate were back at her apartment making out after it. He was a bit fuzzy on how exactly they’d gotten back there thanks to those Long Island iced teas, but that was the least of his concerns at the moment.

The kissing was a little weird at first, mainly because of her fur, and when they started using tongues he also wasn’t used to feeling fangs. But, he really liked Kate, so it didn’t take very long for him to get into it. Then she was tugging on his vest and giving him this Look and next thing he knew they were both in their underwear.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Kate said in a light-hearted sort of way.

“Of course!” Princeton said, withdrawing from nibbling her pointed ear.

“I’ve never actually been with a non-monster before.”

He blushed. “Well, I’ve, um, never been with a monster, so we’re even, then.”

“Guess we’ll be each other’s first,” she said, and they both laughed.

Kate slipped her arms up and over his shoulders, and he shuddered at how nice it felt; her fur was so damn soft. Princeton shifted downwards and kissed her neck in response.

He hadn’t really been in any long-lasting relationships in college, but he had a decent understanding on what worked on women during foreplay. He was, therefore, rather surprised that Kate didn’t really react to that kiss, and pushed himself up so he could see what was wrong.

She stared at him for a moment. “Hey,” she said, and glanced off to the side, “um, sorry, I have fur.”

“W-well, um, I don’t really _mind_ -“

“No, Princeton, um, I can’t feel kisses through it all that well, you have to bite.”

“Ooooh,” he said. It took him a few seconds to realize how embarrassed she seemed to be by that, so he leaned back down to her neck and startled nuzzling it. Then, as he felt her start to relax, he nipped her throat.

He’d expected the little gasp this time, sure, just not the sharp stinging in his back. A yelp escaped his throat as he cringed against Kate. She lifted her arms off him rather quickly.

“Sorry! Sorry!” Kate said, her hands hovering over his shoulders, “I-I, um, that happens sometimes. It’s normal with monsters.”

For the first time that night, he noticed that her nails looked an awful lot like claws.

“I-it’s fine- _ow_!“ Princeton hissed as his back throbbed. He ran his hand over the cuts, relieved to find he wasn’t bleeding. “Just, um, try to remember that I _don’t_ have fur.”

“I-I know, sorry,” she said. Princeton flinched when she seemed to wilt under him.

“Hey, um, you could probably, err, slide your hands down my back again,” he said, and kissed her on the cheek, “They’re soft, it’ll, uh, make me feel better.”

“Yeah?”

He shivered again as her hands slowly traversed his back again, the sensation sending chills down his spine. As they reached the edge of their range and she started moving them upwards again, he moaned into her neck. That seemed to cheer her up.

“I think we’re getting the hang of this,” Princeton said, smiling at her. Kate grabbed the sides of his head and pulled him into a kiss. He could feel her claws digging in, but it was light enough that it was more arousing than anything else.

They gripped each other tightly, Princeton’s fingers fumbling with the clasp on her bra. After what felt like an eternity, he finally managed to undo it. The kiss broke shortly afterwards.

“That’s more like it,” Kate gasped, and tugged her bra straps off her shoulders. Things worked out a little better after that.


	2. Showering

“So you don’t sweat?”

Kate squeezed more shampoo on to her hand and started lathering up her chest. “ _No_ , I have fur, Princeton. I’d just get all soggy.” She handed him the bottle.

“So what do you do then, pant?” he said, putting the shampoo right on her back and rubbing it in.

“Yeah,” Kate said, hands sliding up to her neck. “Gosh, how haven’t you noticed this? It’s like all I do when we have sex.”

Princeton’s hands moved to her shoulders, fingers digging in a bit as he sudsed them. “I just thought it was something you did during sex.”

Kate rolled her eyes. “This is exactly what I’ve been saying! Sure, we learn all about _people_ , but they don’t bother to teach _monster_ anatomy in schools.”

“To be fair,” Princeton said, moving further down her back, “it’s not _that_ different from the human stuff.”

“If I take hot showers I pass out, Princeton; it’s important stuff to know.”

Kate grabbed the shampoo bottle again, hissing out a string of curses as it slipped from her rather foamy hand. “Shit!” she grumbled, bending over to pick it back up.

Princeton stared at her tail, a bit weirded out by how it looked sopping wet. Normally it was just a little ball of fuzz, but at the moment it was a skinny stub with dripping fur hanging off of it. He glanced over at the wall to avoid thinking about it too much further.

“Anyways, where was I?” Kate said, turning slightly so she stood back up facing Princeton. He blinked a couple of times.

“Um, you pass out in the shower?”

“ _Hot_ showers, that’s why it’s lukewarm right now.”

“Right.”

Kate put more shampoo in her hand and Princeton stuck his out for some as well. “So we really have to put this _everywhere_ on you?” he said, rubbing his hands together.

“Yep,” she said, scrubbing at her stomach. Princeton swallowed hard as he watched her.

“Alright,” he said, hands resting on her hips. “O-oh, looks like we haven’t gotten down there yet.”

“Down where?”

“Here.”

Kate squeaked as Princeton started rubbing his soapy hands on the fur around her crotch. “Princeton! I’m all sudsy!”

He persisted with his lathering. “Well, you can rinse off first, right?”

“ _Nooo_ , we’ve still got my legs and stuff to do! It’ll wreck my pattern if I wash everything off now.”

Princeton laughed and stopped rubbing briefly, then stuck one of his hands under the shower spray, rinsing it off. “Well, I can still bang sudsy Kate.”

Kate giggled as his hand rested against the side of her face. “That’s sweet, Princeton, but I don’t think you realize how long this shower’s going to take.”

“Oh, it can’t be _that_ much longer,” he said, and kissed her. He was glad she hadn’t washed her face yet.

He leaned further into it and, after a decent amount of kissing, Kate finally gave in. Her arms wrapped around his neck and his body jolted at the sensation of cold, wet fur; it felt like a slippery, soaked blanket on his back.

It took a lot of willpower not to recoil, but at least making out with Kate made things easier. Once he started feeling her fangs pressing into his tongue ever-so-slightly his brain just about shut off and his body warmed up tremendously. Then, almost as quickly as it started, they pulled apart from each other gasping.

Kate was practically dangling from Princeton. “Well this was a bad idea,” she murmured after a bit, tongue hanging from the corner of her mouth.

“Why’s… why’s that?”

“I just wanna have sex now, but we haven’t even finished with the _shampoo._ ”

Princeton stared at her. “You mean we’re _not_ done after the shampoo?”

“No, there’s still conditioner left, and then I’ve got this stuff I rub in afterwards.”

“ _Shit_.”

They leaned on each other for another couple minutes and then Kate grabbed the shampoo bottle again. “Anyways, we were at my legs, right?”

Princeton sighed, “Yeah.”


	3. Painting Nails

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kate does her nails. Also I have way too much fun exploiting the fact that Gremlins is one of her favorite movies.

Princeton sifted through the box of video tapes in the living room, a bit off-put by the sheer number of chick flicks. Obviously he knew Kate loved them, and he didn’t mind watching one with her once in a while, but gosh they were like the only movies she owned. Well, that and Disney movies. He hit the bottom of the box and paused, a bit taken aback at the last title.

Around then Kate walked in with some sort of tote. He hadn’t looked at her, but he could tell by the sounds of things jostling in it that she had it. Still hung up on the movie, he turned over towards her.

“ _Gremlins_?” he said, gesturing at the tape in his hand, “You own _Gremlins_?”

“It’s one of the biggest movies starring monsters from when I was growing up!” Kate said, crossing her arms. “ _Plus_ they’re adorable.”

“Huh,” Princeton said and stared at the tape for a minute. He stuck it into the vcr. “Guess we’ll watch it then!”

He pushed himself back up on his feet and headed over to the couch, flopping down on it next to Kate. She opened up her tote and looked over at him.

“What color should I paint my nails?” she said, smiling. He blinked a couple of times.

“Um, what colors do you have?”

Kate peered into the box. “Uhhh, let’s see, there’s light pink, green, red, light blue, dark pink, maroon-.” She paused and glanced up at him. “Any of those sound good?”

“Hmmm.”

Princeton did a quick skim over of her appearance. Obviously he knew what she looked like, but he was hoping some sort of detail would stick out to help him. Even if he absolutely sucked at matching things, he was trying not to be such a stereotypically absent boyfriend as of late.

His eyes lit up. “Ooo, what color green is it?”

“It’s this one,” Kate said, lifting the bottle for him. He nodded.

“Yeah, do that one! It matches your nose.”

Giggling, Kate set the nail polish on the floor and started to get some rubber bands out of her tote. “Oh, um, nail polish remover isn’t going to bother you, is it?” She picked up the bottle and shook it a couple times for emphasis.

“Don’t think so.”

“Alright, just checking.”

A couple other things were set out, and then she climbed on to his lap. They exchanged a quick kiss before Kate started sliding the rubber bands on her fingers. They pushed the fur back from her nails, revealing the last half of them that were usually covered. Princeton stared, a bit shocked at how much longer they were. He knew better than to say anything, though.

Kate huffed when she finished getting her hands ready. “Gosh, these’re long! Guess I’m clipping them, too.”

Apparently he could’ve said something.

Around then the previews finally finished up and Kate started snipping away at her claws. Princeton was trying to watch the movie, he really was, but gosh it was hard to when his girlfriend was using dog nail trimmers on herself. It got a little easier to focus when she started filing them, at least.

“Can you hold this?” Kate said, handing him the bottle of nail polish. She unscrewed the cap and started painting her nails and he finally managed to focus on the movie for a little while. They were at the part where Gizmo gets water on him. As the other mogwai spawned, Kate suddenly pointed at the TV.

“Ooo, I met him once!” she said, a now-green nail aimed at Stripe. Princeton blinked.

“What?”

“Yeah!” Kate said, returning to her painting, “My parents took me out for a walk in Central Park when I was little and he was just _there._ ”

“Huh.”

“Small world!”

A couple minutes later, Kate stuck the cap back on the bottle and admired her hands. Princeton glanced over at them, slightly satisfied that he’d picked a nice color.

“How do they look?” Kate said, beaming.

“Great!” Princeton said, and kissed the side of her head. “Not as great as you do, though.”

“Princeton, oh my god!” She broke out in giggles and pressed her face into his neck. “You’re so _cheesy!_ ”

He nuzzled the top of her head. “Yeah, but you like it.”

“What’s your point?” Kate said coyly. She shifted a bit so she could see the movie and snuggled back against him. Princeton swung his arm around her and gave her a peck on the lips before settling down again.

“You want to help me do my toenails next?” she added. Princeton stared at the tv a little harder.

“Uhhhh, that seems like a bad idea.”

“I’ll tell you when to _stop_ , I have these crazy things called nerves.”

He glanced over at her briefly and then looked back at the screen. “I don’t know, maybe, we’ll see.”

She laughed and kissed his neck. “You’re such a baby.”


	4. Scratch Marks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I got a little crazy with this one since Kate and Princeton got canon married lol

The morning light drifted in through cheap curtains, its brightness casting over Kate’s face. It took about an hour for them to wake her up, but eventually her eyes registered it and she blinked awake.

They were in a decently cheap hotel room. That is, her and Princeton were. He was hugging her loosely in a deep sleep, his face just a few inches above hers. His exhales gently tickled the fur on the bridge of her nose. 

Smiling at the faint sensations, Kate buried her face into Princeton’s neck and nuzzled it softly. Eventually a soft groan left his throat and his hug tightened just a hair. His lips pressed against her forehead and Kate pulled away from his throat to look at him.

“G’morning, baby,” she said, her words mildly slurred by drowsiness and a very faint hangover. Princeton started stroking her back.

“How’d my beautiful _wife_ sleep last night, huh?” he said, and Kate broke out in flustered giggles. Her face pressed back against his neck.

After a brief moment of recovery, she took a deep breath. “Alright, just a little sore is all.”

“That’s good.”

They fell into silence for about ten minutes afterwards and just enjoyed each other’s presence. Kate’s eyes slid shut and she started to doze back off, and then Princeton shook her softly. She whined and cracked an eye open.

“Hey babe, it’s like 10:30, we should probably get ready,” he said. Sighing, Kate stretched and blinked a few times to help herself wake up. Princeton released her from his hug and pushed himself up into a sitting position. She followed suit a minute or so later.

“I know I was the one that wanted to go swimming, but god I’m not in the mood for it now,” Kate said, rubbing her face. Princeton leaned over and kissed her cheek. He lingered afterwards, so Kate took the opportunity to kiss him on the lips. Princeton returned it as well as he could, but they were at an awkward angle so it wasn’t all that effective. He broke it off when his neck started to hurt a bit.

“My parents paid for our plane tickets-“ he said, sliding off the bed “-so we should do a _little_ more than just bang in a cheap hotel room.”

“I _guess_!” Kate said playfully. A small smile twitched on to her face as her attention redirected to her hand. She pressed a finger to the jewel on her golden ring and let out a soft sigh. 

She turned to look at Princeton. “You’ve got your ring on still, right?”

He laughed. “Yeah, Kate! I just got it yesterday!”

She glanced off to the side. “I _know_ , I just, um, wanna see it.”

With a grin, Princeton walked over to her and sat down beside her. He held his hand out to her and she grasped it and stared at the small gold band on his ring finger. She giggled and kissed him, an overwhelming amount of happiness hitting her chest.

“I love yoouuuu,” Kate said in a soft coo. She rested her head on his shoulder and Princeton kissed the top of it.

“Love you, too.”

They sat there for a couple of minutes, and then Kate patted his thigh. “Alright, beach time!”

“Can’t wait to see you in that swimsuit,” Princeton grinned. Kate laughed.

“I’m naked right now, how is that any better?”

He got up to his feet and stretched. “Well, you look great now, and you’ll look just as great in a different sort of way!” There was a pause as he started to rummage through his suitcase, so Kate smirked at him. 

“It’s because it’s skin-tight, isn’t it?” she said. Princeton pulled out his red pair of swim trunks and shot a finger pistol at her.

“Yeah that’s it!”

She snorted.

With a yawn, Princeton headed over to the bathroom. “Alright, I’m gonna clean up a little.”

“Oh, I’ve gotta do that too, don’t I,” Kate said. She stared down at herself and sighed as the bathroom door shut. Having fur _really_ made it hard to take a quick shower, so that meant some really weird and specific spot-cleaning was about to happen.

The shower turned on and she got up to her feet, a bit surprised to find herself mildly wobbly still. Laughing just a little, she meandered over to her suitcase and pulled out her swimsuit. It was a pink one-piece with a white stripe down either side, which was thrown over her shoulder as she walked to the bathroom.

Princeton hadn’t locked it, obviously, so Kate pushed the door open and swung it shut behind her. Then, she dropped her swimsuit on the ground, grabbed a washcloth off the towel rack and gave it a quick dousing, and started scrubbing the bits of her face crusted with drool. Panting got really messy sometimes.

She continued to work her way down, carefully looking for similar spots. The shower turned off and Princeton got out behind her and grabbed a towel off the rack. His drying off took substantially less time than her touch-ups, so much so that by the time he’d pulled on his swim trunks and fixed his hair a little bit, Kate was just starting to wash her inner thighs.

“Gee, Kate, aren’t you done yet?” he said, grinning. She shoved him lightly.

“You shut your mouth,” Kate said, continuing to clean up her legs with a small smile on her face.

After a couple minutes she decided she was decent enough and picked her swimsuit back up. She pulled it on without too much trouble and looked herself over to make sure there weren’t any weird spots left on her fur.

“Do I look alright?” she said, eyes going to the mirror. 

Princeton slipped his arms around her. “Yeah!” he said, and kissed her ear. “You’d look _even better_ in a bikini, though.”

“No way, mister!”

“Worth a shot.”

They kissed and Princeton let go of her. “Alright, we need to put sunscreen on now,” Kate said. She grabbed Princeton’s hand and they walked out of the bathroom together. “I can probably put it on your back for you!”

“Doesn’t it get your fur all greasy?” Princeton said as she started digging the bottle out of her suitcase. She pulled it out, popped the cap off, and squeezed it out on the little bare spots on her hands that mildly resembled paw pads.

“That’s alright, it’s just my hands!” she chirped, “Now turn around.”

“Alright!”

He turned and Kate lifted up her hands and then paused. Her fur prickled as heat rushed to her face. “Oh my god,” she said, eyes wide.

“What?” Princeton said, biting back a laugh. He could hear the embarrassment in her voice.

Kate’s eyes scanned his back over and over. She figured that she gave him some scratches when they had sex, it just made sense. She had claws, and when she grabbed at him sometimes they dug in a little too much. It just never occurred to her that there would be _that_ many.

“How haven’t I noticed you had all these scratch marks before?”

“Oh those?” Princeton said, glancing over his shoulder, “I’ve always had those. You’re, well, you’re pretty grabby.”

“Oh,” Kate said. She pressed her hands up to him and started rubbing the sunscreen on. Her hands came to a sudden stop as a terrible realization dawned on her. “Oh god, we’re going to the beach, people are going to _see that_.”

Princeton grinned. “Guess they’ll know who _my_ wife is.” 

“Yeah right, they’ll probably be thinking ‘oh that terrible woman, I can’t believe she treats her husband like that’.”

There was a pause as Kate continued to smear sunscreen over his back and Princeton fell silent. He cleared his throat. “They don’t _hurt_ , I’m really used to you doing it! It’s just kind of, well, _hot_ now.”

She slid her hands up to his shoulders. “Well, at least there’s that.”

“I can just _tell_ people you’re nice-” Princeton said, glancing back at her brightly, “-because you are!”

Kate took a deep breath and gave him a small smile. “Thanks, baby.” She pulled her hands off his back and wiped them off on her legs. “Alright! You can put the rest on yourself.”

Princeton turned and gave her a quick kiss. “Awesome! Thanks, Kate!” He picked up the bottle of sunscreen and squeezed a bit out on his hand. Then, he touched a fingertip to it and smeared it over Kate’s nose. “-And now _you’re_ done!”

“Aww, you remembered!” she said. Her finger rubbed the sunscreen in the rest of the way, and Princeton pulled her into a hug.

“Of course! Don’t want your cute little nose to burn,” he said, and gave her a peck on the forehead. Kate smiled at the fluttering that put in her chest.

“You’re so sweet!”

“So are you!”

They stared at each other for a second, mushiness dripping from their gazes. Kate tilted her head slightly, her hands shifting to his chest. His moved to her hips, and for a moment they were just two newlyweds in a hotel room who were definitely not going swimming. Princeton started to lean in and then someone knocked on the door and the hormones died down.

“Housekeeping! Anyone in there?”

The couple glanced at the door and then back at each other.

“Oh, um, we’re on our way out!” Kate said, grabbing her purse and a couple beach towels off the floor. Princeton dug his wallet out of his pants from the day before and stuffed it into her bag.

“Yep!” he added, jogging over to the door and opening it up. The two of them waved at the worker awkwardly and snuck out past her.

They were at the point in their honeymoon where it was time to make other people uncomfortable with their gushing anyways.


End file.
